this post was submitted on 08 May 2025
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Lemmy Shitpost

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Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

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[–] [email protected] 165 points 2 weeks ago (11 children)
[–] [email protected] 77 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

You can always trust SatansMaggotyCumFart to chime in with the wholesome memes.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

I'm starting to remember his name and I don't want to 🤢

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Stick around for a few more months and you'll remember them no matter how hard you try to forget. They're one of the most active users on Lemmy. I honestly wouldn't be surprised to find out they are the most active commenter.

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 weeks ago

Please cease existing.

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago)

My girlfriend does this to me during sex. Peels me like a disobedient potato

[–] [email protected] 14 points 2 weeks ago

I can just feel this image. This is just the worst thing I could have seen tonight. Good job.

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[–] [email protected] 127 points 2 weeks ago (8 children)
[–] [email protected] 65 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

Where we're going we won't need fingernails

[–] [email protected] 42 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 33 points 2 weeks ago

Always kept short and clean

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[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 weeks ago

When you refuse to give answers when tortured! You clearly are no rat. 🙌

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 weeks ago

Years back I was briefly into creepypastas. One I read was a guy who had a habit of chewing his nails and that people around him always made a big deal about it but he thought they were overreacting. At the end it was revealed that he had long ago chewed away his fingernails and was now chewing through his actual fingers without realizing it. As a result he was institutionalized for his delusions, I think.

This picture makes me think of that. Thanks, I guess.

[–] vithigar 13 points 2 weeks ago (13 children)

You joke, but I'm missing a nail on one of my big toes and it's so much more comfortable and less hassle that I kind of wish all my toenails were gone.

...not so sure about fingernails though. They're pretty useful for picking things up or praying things open.

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[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 weeks ago
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[–] [email protected] 57 points 2 weeks ago (13 children)

I did until like a week ago.

I’d had enough as they hurt and wasn’t getting better, I do a lot of rock climbing so the chalk makes the issue worse, plus I have not been doing great mentally so diet and hydration was awful.

What I did:

  • Bought some Nails Inc Cuticle Oil (I am male, but it works). You just add a bit and rub it in. I now use this most days and definitely after climbing.
  • I know that with a poor diet I am likely missing vitamins as some of my nails had lines down them. I take a cheap multi vitamin everyday.
  • I am conscious to drink more water, although I already drink 2-3liter a day.
  • I am making plans to improve my eating habits as I get decision fatigue and really just don’t eat enough. Think I’ve been alive too long that food is just meh at this point. But I went climbing yesterday on hardly anything and felt incredibly sick.

My nails are better now. My mental health not so much but one step at a time.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

I'm positive 95% of your results came just from drinking more water. when your hands look like the picture, it's almost definitely because you're chronically dehydrated.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 1 week ago (1 children)

I am not so sure. As I said in the post I drink a lot of water.

So I wake up and have a cup of tea and for evening meal I have a can of Pepsi. Everything else in the day is just water and never less than 1.5 litres.

For me at least I think it was the climbing chalk and poor eating habits so lacking vitamins. I guess I’ll never truly know and it’s good advice to be hydrated.

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[–] [email protected] 54 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Stop eating your cuticles, lol

[–] [email protected] 17 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)
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[–] [email protected] 45 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

This appears to be a lack of melatonin. When you get sun, there should at least be some pigment.

[–] [email protected] 60 points 2 weeks ago (5 children)

Melatonin is what makes people sleep

You're thinking of melinoma

[–] [email protected] 57 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

Melinoma is what makes people have cancer
You’re thinking of melancholy

[–] [email protected] 52 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Melancholy is what Hamlet had, I think you mean Melania

[–] [email protected] 48 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

Melania is what turns people orange. You're thinking of mitochondria

[–] [email protected] 40 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Mitochondria is the power house of the cell, you're thinking of Mephistopheles

[–] [email protected] 23 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Mephistopheles is Hell's Messenger, you're thinking of malaria

[–] [email protected] 19 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Malaria is a mosquito-borne pathogen. You're thinking of maltodextrin.

[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Maltodextrin is a highly processed, white powder carbohydrate derived from starches. You're thinking of Malenia, Blade of Miquella.

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (2 children)

Malenia is a Elden Ring character. You're thinking of megakaryocytopoiesis

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[–] [email protected] 38 points 2 weeks ago* (last edited 2 weeks ago) (1 children)

Fuck you.

Just fuck you and quit attacking me

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[–] ininewcrow 27 points 2 weeks ago (7 children)

Moisturizer

Get a brand called Cetaphil and use it on your hands every day or whenever they dry out.

I've worked in construction and I like working as a mechanic in my own vehicles ..... it means my bare hands get exposed to a lot of dirt, sand, mud, metal, oil and chemicals ... which means I have to wash with lots of soap and chemicals. In the winter it's worse in the dry cold air.

So my hands get dry chapped and even cracked and start bleeding. My skin is so cracked and broken now that I can no longer use my finger print ID on my phone. I've tried resetting it multiple times but a new crack forms and then no longer works again.

For years I put up with it and pretended I was a man that didn't need help .... but I got sick and tired of it and started using moisturizer and I really don't care what anyone says about it.

I still get dry cracked skin but not as often and not as severe.

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[–] digger 19 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

I'm not going to tell you how long I looked at this, expecting to find loss or Saddam Hussein.

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[–] [email protected] 18 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Mom turned me onto corn husker's oil. Figured since we shared genes, and it worked for her, might as well. Shit is the bomb. Tiny dab'll do ya, doesn't leave your hands greasy, dries fast, works fast, cheap, all that.

My fingertips split in cold and dry air. Apparently I got a weird gene from great grandma, never met another person with the problem. Tiny crack across the tip, skin dies and turns hard, splits deeper, rinse and repeat. And the pain is stunning, like having an infected splinter stuck in your fingertip. Got that shit this year working outside in February and into March. Only took a few nights of using corn husker's oil, GTG.

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[–] [email protected] 16 points 2 weeks ago

If having lotion in your hands makes you uncomfortable, try just dabbing a tiny bit on the the backs of your fingernails and rubbing them against each other to spread it only on your cuticles. No slimy fingerpads or palms, and it really helps.

[–] rbos 15 points 2 weeks ago (5 children)

I find just snipping off the skin tags with clippers keeps it from going too far.

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 2 weeks ago

I used to get this all the time. Now, if I get a hangnail, I liberally drench my hands in lotion, and put on nitrile gloves for an hour or so to force it to soak in.

A family friend gets me Gojo Hand Medic, which my fragile masculinity appreciates.

I also found it works well for breaking in leather work gloves.

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 week ago

How did you get that photo of my hand?

[–] [email protected] 12 points 1 week ago (2 children)

Interesting how much people don't understand. So for u normies, non autistic people here: NO , the skin doesn't get like that by its own, it's not moisture, cream or anything, it's just we can't stop messing with our thingers and constantly damage the border of nails like that.

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[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 weeks ago
[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

If having lotion in your hands makes you uncomfortable, try just putting a

[–] [email protected] 15 points 2 weeks ago (1 children)

Guys, they got Mouselemming

[–] [email protected] 12 points 2 weeks ago

Augh, I'm okay but so embarrassed!

Just gonna add, you can use a stick of lip balm on cuticles!

[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 weeks ago (2 children)

Have you tried going to a doctor to see what is wrong? PPE if you work somewhere hazardous? Moisturizing if you're somewhere very dry?

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[–] [email protected] 10 points 2 weeks ago (3 children)

POST PICTURES OF YOUR HAND

[–] [email protected] 11 points 2 weeks ago (4 children)

Great, now there are hands fetishists too?!

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