this post was submitted on 17 May 2025
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[–] epicstove 10 points 2 days ago (2 children)

Gotta buy that super insurance. Covers all super hero/villain related accidents.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago (1 children)

This genuinely sounds like the work of a typical mega insurance corp in the US.

*Get insured because you don't know when a superhero or super villain might come and wreak havoc on your belongings, transportation, living space, or even YOU. Just pay this [Insert some goddly amount] to join the million + people that think such a thing will happen to them (but probably will never happen to them and we don't give a fuck about you nor if it actually happens to you or not. Even when it does happen to you, we will have the "right" and "ability" to deny your claim, even though that's what this insurance policy is for. So get wrecked pawn scum-didili-dumb-dumb.)

[–] epicstove 2 points 1 day ago

They pay the super villains to wreak the shit of people that haven't bought the insurance to get more people to buy it.

[–] ILikeBoobies 4 points 2 days ago

It goes on the heroes’ insurance

[–] [email protected] 20 points 3 days ago

“Thor destroyed my car!”

“Sorry sir, act of god”

[–] [email protected] 6 points 2 days ago

I think that woman might have some problems with her blood pressure.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 2 points 2 days ago

LOL I haven't seen that site in ages!

So many awesome covers!

It's like this multi-decade period of preinternet click-bait insanity... Superman's doing WHAT?!

[–] [email protected] 31 points 4 days ago (1 children)

"Our insurance does not cover acts of Superman."

[–] [email protected] 15 points 4 days ago

Switch to Luthor Insurance. We cover acts of Superman, alien invasion, cataclysm, even Darkseid.

By signing this waiver, the insured party (hereafter referred to as “the unfortunate soul”) acknowledges that Luthor Insurance assumes no responsibility for any claims, damages, disasters, acts of villainy, or mysterious disappearances.

Terms & Conditions:

  1. Luthor Insurance reserves the right to deny all claims on the grounds of "bad luck."
  2. Any attempt to file a claim may result in an additional “Inconvenience Fee.”
  3. Coverage excludes fire, floods, theft, accidents, misfortune, betrayal, and all incidents involving curses, hexes, or ominous coincidences.
  4. Luthor Insurance retains the right to unilaterally change policy terms, preferably when it is least convenient for the insured.
  5. Any disputes must be settled in the Luthor Insurance Court of Unfair Appeals, where rulings are final and always favor Luthor Insurance.

By signing below, the unfortunate soul agrees to these terms in perpetuity and waives all rights to fairness, justice, or reasonable compensation.

Signature: _______________
Date: _______________

[–] [email protected] 15 points 4 days ago (2 children)

Insurance would totally try to claim Act of God on that one.

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 days ago

In a world with superheroes there would totally be superhero insurance

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 days ago

That's when you sue god

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 days ago (1 children)

I bet insurance does not cover that in that Universe.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 5 points 3 days ago (1 children)

If Supes is doing it to stop some dickwad from destroying the Earth, enslaving humanity, or erasing the concept of pizzas, I'll be yelling at him to do it again. Fuck the car, I can walk!

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 days ago

Please, not in this timeline. Its homelander pumelling a camera crew that filmed him killing a bus full of kids with cancer.

[–] [email protected] 7 points 3 days ago (1 children)

On a related note:

United States Department of Damage Control is a fictional construction company appearing in American comic books published by Marvel Comics. The company specializes in repairing the property damage caused by conflicts between superheroes and supervillains.[1] Three Damage Control limited series have been published.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Damage_Control_(comics)

Also note that the initials of "Damage Control" are "D.C."

This goes part of the way to explain why people are willing to continue to live in NYC despite it being regularly attacked by supervillains, aliens, demons, etc. Though, I still think Philadelphia, Newark, Allentown and New Haven would probably be experiencing a lot of growth, seeing as they appear to be close to NYC and yet safe from the NYC chaos and danger.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 days ago

Probably not in Allentown, since Billy Joel informs me that they're closing all the factories down.

[–] MadMadBunny 21 points 4 days ago (2 children)

He has insurance for that, right?

Right?

[–] [email protected] 9 points 4 days ago (4 children)

Insurance doesn't cover acts of God

[–] [email protected] 6 points 3 days ago (1 children)

Funny side topic:

Insurance doesn’t cover acts of terrorism. So, by the DOJ placing that label on recent Tesla vandalism, the insurance claims become invalid.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 3 days ago

So basically one shouldnt get a tesla since insurance wont cover it?

[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 days ago

I could probably convince a jury he’s more of an alien

[–] [email protected] 1 points 4 days ago (1 children)

Superman isn't a god. The definitions of what a god is across cultures are pretty varied, but one thing that pretty much all of them have in common is that a god has authority over at least some part of nature (often being a personification of that part.) Superman has no authority (beyond the trust that humans willingly give to him do to his actions,) he's just really strong.

The fact that modern writers insist on treating Superman as a god is one of the reasons why so many modern Superman stories suck.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 4 days ago (1 children)

i um, i think it was a joke

[–] [email protected] 1 points 4 days ago

A lot of writers don't treat it as a joke.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 4 days ago (1 children)

He's called superman, not supergod

[–] [email protected] 0 points 4 days ago

Jesus is both man and god. Have we considered the possibility of a superjesus?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 4 days ago
  1. In his extra undies he is in incognito mode, which is funnily him taking his glasses off… So I reckon his real sacrifice is one of chastity…
  2. He is broke, canonically so!

So no, but thats why you read the small print on your contract to make sure that you only have to worry about your life in a case of alien invasion/terrorist attack/…

[–] [email protected] 11 points 4 days ago (1 children)
[–] [email protected] 4 points 4 days ago

Well, as of the last trailer there isn't much of a difference between Superman and Homelander. Both are whiny, entitled assholes who believe that it's unthinkable that anyone should question how they use their powers.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 3 days ago (2 children)

what is this pic actually from?

[–] [email protected] 2 points 3 days ago

That's why you get the gap insurance.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 4 days ago (1 children)

I mean, depending on how much the value of the car has changed, you might get lucky. My last car got totaled by severe hail, I'd only paid maybe 30% of it off by that point, but it turned out the value of my vehicle went mostly unchanged, possibly even raised slightly, and insurance paid out the full value of the car. I actually came out ahead a couple thousand dollars, which I was able to then use for a down payment on my current car.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Do people not just buy cars they can afford anymore? When I grew up I didn't know anyone that was taking out a loan for a car.

[–] [email protected] 4 points 2 days ago (1 children)

People could afford a house on a single income as a Hs grad, too.

[–] [email protected] 0 points 2 days ago (1 children)

Unlike houses I am not sure if cars have increase as much though. You can even find a Nissan leaf dropping below £5k last I checked.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago (1 children)

I don't know a single car available near me that isn't a complete junker and is under $10,000. I also don't know anyone with $5,000 on hand to drop on Anything. I barely even know anyone with $1,000 to drop on anything. Americans don't have money for anything, we are buying Groceries using loans at this point. That is not a joke, people are buying essential groceries using Pay Later Loans.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago (1 children)

How are you on such high salaries and yet so poor?

[–] [email protected] 1 points 2 days ago

That is a very complicated question, but it comes down to many factors. First is high inflation combined with stagnant wages, as wages have been basically stuck and barely increased in the last 30-40 years while inflation continued to increase, so that's why most people make around $35,000 salary and spend most of that money on essentials. Minimum wage federally is $7.25/hour, which means 1 hour of work doesn't even earn enough money to buy a meal at McDonalds anymore. This is why most people these days have 2 jobs.

Then you also have landlords continually jacking up rent prices and working as literal cartels (several landlords were recently brought up on charges due to using apps to coordinate rent increases across entire cities and states so that all housing would increase in price at the same rate, ensuring no competitive pricing would occur) meaning rent continues to rise faster than inflation or wages.

Alongside that is student loan debts, as companies more and more only hire people with degrees and colleges keep increasing tuition to pay for essential things like yatchs. Yes, yatchs, as the government does not cap the amount private colleges can charge the government or students for basically anything, so they will just put down anything they want as "General Overhead" charges. Again, multiple private universities have been recently in legal trouble for this, with basically no consequences. So, tuition goes up to pay for unneeded things purely due to the fact the government even provides student loans, and student loan debt basically doesn't go away Ever because the government said, like 50 years ago, that they'd be the guarantor of all student loans, meaning colleges could go "Oh, great, so I make money regardless of whether a student can or can't afford to be here, and whether or not said student graduates and can pay off the loan." Then, once students started defaulting on loans they couldn't pay off, government started changing the rules on the debt to ensure you can't get rid of it.

There is a whole lot more to get into with why Americans are so fucked economically, but I'm nowhere near qualified to explain everything.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 3 days ago

Don't worry you can move to Gotham where batman will cripple you rather than figuring out uc for it's citizens

[–] [email protected] -1 points 4 days ago

So... In that movie, I guess Superman appears without uan? Well, makes sense, why would he need chinese currency.